SOPOR_blog
Date
26th May 2011
most_english_guys_look_like_shit
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videotrivia
You may or may not know this, but initially there was a second video planned for the release of the fabulous SOPOR album »Have you seen this Ghost?« ... and it was going to be for the song »POWDER«.
 
In 2010 we received a letter from a newly founded production-company, based in London, offering to do a music-video for us ... – for free. (
Nooo, not suspicious at all). Generally, this sort of mail marches straight into the bin, as usually I can tell right away, whether something is worth bothering or not. Sadly, in 99,99% of the time it simply isn’t. Books, documentaries, videogames, films, soundtracks ... you wouldn’t believe the amount of phoney requests we are getting. However, with this particular one, I really couldn’t say for sure, as I was picking up these irritatingly mixed vibes: one part of me advised to just forget about it, while another part felt that ‘something good or interesting’ might come out of this.

Well, obviously, in the end that video didn’t happen. But one step at a time ...
 
The guy contacting us was from Eastern Whatsoever, so there was bit of a language-barrier from the very beginning, which is always slightly annoying. Plus his communication was a tad sloppy, and that’s a thing that never sits well with me. Apparently, he had done two short-films before, and since the visuals that I had in mind for the clip required at least one supporting actor, he asked one of the stunt-guys, who had previously performed in one of his productions, if he was interested in playing that part. I don’t know what
exactly it was that he told him, but from what I gathered later, his translation (slash ‘interpretation’) of my original idea must have sounded like some weird gay porn, so it didn’t really come as a surprise to me that the poor man declined.
I am not going to tell you what the storyline was (because I might still use it after all), but at this point the plan was to do a second video for the song »
SLEEP«, all glossy and hi-def, essentially as a MTV-style counterpart for the bleak sewer clip that eventually came with the album.
Since the video was to be shot on a set in a studio in London, it seemed like a good idea to search for a new actor in the database of one of the leading local agencies.
There was only one tiny problem (now let me share my wisdom with you):
for_better_illustration
But don’t get any ideas, bitches!

Because for one,
I saw him first ... and for two, he is happily married.
So, hands off, sluts.
 
Unfortunately for everyone on this planet ... the video was never shot, because after a while it became rather obvious, that the ‘director’ had no real interest in anybody else’s ideas but his own (
bad move in SOPOR-land ... bad, bad move!), plus he seemed to feel that I didn’t really trust his "artistic vision".  Well, what can I say ... - he was certainly right about that one.
DungCarrot
... where they build a giant medieval fortified insane asylum in the middle of the forest, where all visitors (especially Japanese tourists seeking their Viking heritage) are compelled to adopt a fake Scottish accent!
 

If you have one or two carrots to spare,

have a look at their

Facebook-site

...

ChewiePlaysPipes
ChewiePlaysPipes
Get the general atmosphere?
 
OK, then ...
out of the shadows behind her a man approaches, tall and muscular, wearing nothing but a heavy, mud-stained kilt. As he stands behind her, he raises his arms to the sky, calling the creatures of the night. Eventually  he lifts up his kilt ... and pisses all over Auntie VaVa ...
 
 

 
 
Funny enough,
Mr. Allan actually turned out to be Scottish (*hey, hey*), which clearly was a sign of approval from the dark muses. His first name, by the way, is Chewie (which, as I was told, is ancient Gaelic for ‘He, who doesn’t shave’) and, being the butch-picture-book-clan-chief, he didn’t even seem to mind becoming my ... well ... Guardian of the Golden Fountain.
 
To make sure that his tattoos wouldn’t clash with the character he was supposed to portray, he even sent me a few
breath-taking(!) photos of himself posing in the nude (yes, boys & girls) ... which, I swear, would make you want to take up bagpipe-lessons right away.   ;P

... that

Mr. Allan

is the head of ...

... which, amongst other things, runs a long-term project, entitled ...
insert_inappropriate_image_here
Naturally, any potential candidate had to meet certain criteria of mine, and being the generous and forgiving Goddess that I am, I was so prepared to turn a blind eye on most of their hideous faults. But even then only five (I repeat: 5) came into further consideration (all of them completely different types), of which two were actually more of a sad compromise.
To cut a boring story short: number 3 wasn’t interested, number 2 was ... well, basically as good as dead (he really was quite old, you see) ... leaving just
one. His name was Mr. Allan, and, judging by his profile-photo, he was trying to pass as 30-something. Well, either that ... or he simply hadn’t bothered to update his profile in years. Luckily, there was a link to a more recent gallery, which showed that he actually looked a lot older in real life. (Oh, wait ... let me rephrase that ... *grin*).
 
By the time I got in contact with him, I had learned that (due to budget-cuts) the video had to be shot on location, so I came up with a new idea, and »
POWDER« became the new song. Since I couldn’t tell what sort of location the 'director' would come up with, I saw no point in wasting my time on working out any details. That is, except for the chorus part, which would have looked something like this:
 
Night. A dark back alley.
Our beloved Goddess AVC is sitting on a wooden chair (or, alternatively,  on the cold stone-floor), dressed in a delicate bridal-gown (of virginal white, of course!), flowers in her hair, a lovely bouquet in her lap.  – Basically a mixture of these images:
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